#man made object

[androids-insides]

Forgot I had free will. Made a poster.

[ifuckinglovelemondemon-srs]

Headphones aren't enough, i need every song in this album up my ass

[tsbluvr]

ALBUM REVIEW NOBODY CARED ABOUT PART VII: SPIRIT PHONE EDITION

Lifetime Achievement Award: 7.75/10

It took me embarrassingly long to realize that the first letters of delta echo alpha delta spell out “D.E.A.D.”. Anyways, EVEN AS WE SPEAK WERE SYNTHESIZING BLOOD AND ORGANS SYNTHESIZING HEART AND SOUL. 

The slow part’s sick as hell (I’m writing this album review as i listen)

It also took me embarrassingly long to catch the Michael Jackson ref

Touch Tone Telephone: 7.75/10

Fun fact: this was the first lemon demon song I actually liked enough to listen to it repeatdly. After i stopped liking this song, i stopped listening to lemon demon, then I found cabinet man, and i started listening to lemon demon more and started liking this song again.

Caminet Man: 5/10

Ehh. I get why it’s popular cause it’s a great song. I just stopped liking it as much when I listened to the rest of the album. Also, it’s probably too late to say this, but I’m rating on how much I like it, not on how good it is.

No Eyed Girl: 7.5/10

Love how the bass Im this song is Neil with a voice effect. Great.

Also, if i’m correct the lyric is “without proof i know” but i thought it was “without proof, oh no!”

When he died: 8/10

Unfortunately, instead of listening to this on Spotify or something, I’m listening to it on audiomack, so i doubt get to hear the great transition from “no eyed girl” into “when he died” :(

Never noticed the slight echo on Neil’s voice before, sick

Sweett bod: 8/10

Don’t play this one in front of your parents!

Who else but Neil would write a song with the lyric “some sexy shaking tumors”

Sick ass guitar solo

Eighth wonder: 6/10

Don’t LOVE it, but it’s a great song.

Fun fact, this song’s only slightly younger than me.

Ancient Aliens: 7/10

I litened to it too much and now I don’t like it anymore :(

Soft fuzzy man: 8/10

One time in math class, we were listening to the class playlist and this song started playing. My math teacher immediately said “this is horrible, who requested this” and as soon as he read who made the song the whole class looked at me.

As Your Father I Expressly Forbid It: 9/10

This song sounds like the red angry bird

I Earn My Life: 9/10

:(

Reaganomics: 10/10

Hell yeah

…

With reaganomics

Baby

Baby

Baby

BABY

YEAHHHHH

Man Made Object:7/10 

I now realize how good the percussion in this album sounds.

This song has the vibes on an instrumental without being one

I love the delivery of the lines “I am an altogether different man by day / I have the influence to send that man far away”

Spiral of Ants: 8/10

The perfect ending to a perfect album

OVERALL ALBUM RATING: 9/10

FAVORITE AND LEAST FAVORITE SONGS:

Probably sweet bod, reaganomics, or as your father i expressly forbid it (yeah i know, not at all consistent with my ratings)

For my least favorite, easily cabinet man

[veezm0]

I had a vision. Of a microwave meal (mac n cheese for me!!). I had a vision. Of a microwave meal (noodles with the cheese!!)

[beebfreeb]

[lemondemonpickuplines]

hnnnnmg i'd like you to penetrate me with a man-made object

[dandeleon]

spirit phone is famously the ford pines album btw☝️☝️

[anghraine]

TMP is honestly this wild trip despite the glacial pacing at times, because it's like—

Vulcan woman: Spock, you've worked hard to purge yourself of all emotion, but your mind is picking up signals from some human and I guess some logic thing in space. my conclusion: you aren't racially pure enough to find your answers here

Spock: time to track down the pure logic thing and find the answers and meaning in my existence as a Vulcan that I've been searching for all my life and definitely never found in the past before all my previous character development got reset

[Meanwhile]

Kirk: so this unknown cosmic force is going to wipe out all life on Earth, and I've been placed in charge because I have a lot of experience dealing with bizarre dangerous cosmic shit as commander of this specific ship, in addition to my missing being in space because I was pushed into the admiralty at, like, age 39

Decker: *throws a series of tantrums about the prioritization of all of Earth above his ego for almost the entire mission*

Ilia: I have taken an oath of celibacy

Kirk: ... not super relevant. please just do your job

[Also, the transporter painfully melts some people we don't know into unrecognizable lumps of flesh. This is completely disconnected from the rest of the movie; it has no relevance to anything else, is immediately forgotten and never acknowledged again, and everyone acts like Bones is silly and paranoid for being nervous about going through the transporter]

Uhura: I think Admiral Kirk is obviously the person most qualified to command our incredibly dangerous and important mission, and we're damned lucky he got put in charge. if anyone cares

[everyone else]: *doesn't care*

McCoy: Jim, maybe you shouldn't make your mid-life crisis everyone else's problem

Decker: yeah! I should still be in charge! my solution is "don't take risks" when encountering the unknown and wait until systems are 100% safe before we do anything

Kirk: again let me reiterate that we need to act decisively even if it's risky or billions of people will die. we have to at least try, so waiting is not an option here

Spock: *shows up and, despite being icy and dismissive, immediately fixes all their most pressing technical problems*

McCoy: maybe we shouldn't trust him. he has his own agenda now

Kirk: wtf of course we can trust him he's Spock how dare

[Kirk quickly figures out the changes to the bridge, and from then on, his judgment and decisions are pretty much continually vindicated by the plot. Decker's advice goes from temporarily useful to unprofessional constant jabs with little sense of the real stakes and no better ideas. It becomes extremely apparent that Kirk really is far better equipped in temperament and experience to deal with the potential slaughter of Earth than Decker, especially when assisted by Spock—even this arctic version of Spock.]

Spock: *knocks out a crewman, steals a spacesuit, and tries to make contact with the cosmic acid trip/space vagina by traveling through what he unenthusiastically describes as its "orifices"*

Kirk: I ... guess maybe Bones was - no, it can't be - wait a moment, I -

Spock: *starts transmitting all the data he's gathering to Kirk*

Kirk: hah, I knew he would never betray me! Okay, everyone, you all stay here, I'm going to jump into space to catch him

[Spock melds with the cosmic space vagina and it violently ejects him through various orifices, as he might describe them, until he's thrown right into Kirk's arms, signifying nothing]

Bones and Chapel: melding with the cosmic logic vagina seems to have fried his brain :(

Spock, laughing: I should have known ...

Kirk: *seizes his shoulders* known WHAT Spock what are you talking about. please tell me your mind is intact. sweetheart it's okay what are you full of shame about this time *tries to shake the brain damage loose*

Spock: Jim ... I melded with the supreme logic being and discovered that there's no beauty or art or meaning in raw information or logic ... only a barren STEM hellscape without the humanities

[Spock slides his hand down Kirk's arm until their fingers wrap around each other, and their joined hands tightly cling together. unrelatedly, we have definitely seen Vulcans and Romulans use finger stroking as kissing and/or foreplay]

Spock: it was awful and empty and not at all what I've been searching for this whole time. and finally I understood that the real meaning in life comes from the simple feeling between you and me. The mechanized space vagina couldn't understand our love

[Kirk wraps his other hand tightly around his and Spock's clasped fingers. God knows what degree of obscenity they would be committing on Vulcan, but in any case, McCoy (as ever) politely pretends he's not seeing this happen right in front of him, since Kirk and Spock obviously have forgotten, yet again, that other people exist]

Kirk: 🥹🥰

[They stare tenderly at each other without speaking for a few seconds, but are definitely communicating on some level; after a moment's hesitation, Kirk nods slightly, then Spock nods in response, and it feels like we're missing half the conversation. Then Spock explains V'ger's existential angst in terms that obviously apply equally to his own past self, and by past I mean "for most of this movie until a few minutes ago"]

It turns out that V'ger, in addition to being a cosmic acid trip/space vagina/mass murderer, is also an annoying teenager, maturity-wise. I do appreciate Kirk and Spock having their "this is just adolescent angst and we are too middle-aged for this nonsense" reaction, and noping out to provoke V'ger into some measure of cooperation until they all figure out that it's trying to communicate with NASA.

In the course of all this, there's a point where Decker manages to be mildly helpful via the Ilia probe sort of remembering their old relationship, and he proves his value at last by welcoming the chance to orgasmically fuse with Ilia/V'ger, while Kirk is horrified and baffled at why Decker would find this remotely appealing. (ngl Kirk in this movie feels like the most purely gay-coded iteration of him; from the film itself, I could easily believe he has lost all attraction to women at this point.)

So thankfully, we're finally free of the weird and underwhelming Decker/Ilia duo via multiple cosmic acid orgasms, and the Earth is saved, etc. In aesthetics, it's all powerfully 70s, even in the awesome strange bits before V'ger looked quite so, uh, yonic. Somehow even the new bland sleepwear version of Starfleet uniforms seem very 70s; apparently Spock's kickass robes and the muscle-revealing quasi-polo top that Kirk promptly switches into consumed all available stylishness.]

Scott: everything's fine now, so I guess we can drop you off at Vulcan, Mr. Spock

Spock: my experiences today have, uh, resolved my need to stay on Vulcan, so there's no reason to detour for me. I'll just tag along to Earth for >_> no reason

Kirk: [deeply vindicated for about the twelfth time that day, but this time also managing to exude Spock is getting laid tonight without saying a word about him] Mr. Sulu, ahead, warp one.

[random-cockroach]

I'm sending you Brave Police Proparganda

Most of it is Gunmax, but in my defense he is a very compelling character.

AND IT WORKS VERY WELL (I mean I already watch and cackle, bear with me I am a slow watcher XDD) OKAY I CAN SEE SOME MOMENTS AND WORDS. OKAY I WANNA SEE IT. WTF.

[phonification]

they put cob's corpse in the eternal torture chamber this is all i ever wanted

[skunkes]

Finally a designated sexyman character in deltarune that i do like AND would not mind seeing risque and inappropriate art of. Thank goodness i dont have to see the cock of that other little freak that i hate anymore

*monkey's paw curls*

[plusultraetc]

I'm so sorry but ever since that teen Hawks page was translated on twitter I can't stop thinking about it. like. Mera treated him like a person. he was assigned to Hawks when he was already a teenager. did no one treat him like a person before then? was it such an uncommon occurrence that it seemed special when someone did? I mean, they didn't even let him have a person's name. they gave him a hero name, and to the HPSC, that was the name of a tool. of a product. they basically bought a child and treated him so coldly that Mera stood out to him because he treated him like a person. the bars of my enclosure.

[rabbits-of-negative-euphoria]

genuinely I think one of the most pressing calls for Christians (namely Protestant Christians) today is to stop underestimating the power of beauty

visual beauty, beauty in word, beauty in sound, beauty in story

we have ceded beauty for the past 70 years to the atheistic world and people of all beliefs are realizing that world has failed to carry that standard. people are realizing their daily lives are starved of beauty--especially natural beauty--so they are turning to the entities which recognize its power. entities like paganism, witchcraft, ancestor worship, the New Age. if they are drawn to Christianity (not necessarily believing it), they are more likely to attend a Roman Catholic or Eastern Orthodox mass.

humans need beauty because humans need God, and beauty belongs to God. which means the church should be the standard-bearer of beauty in this world.

if a church can afford it, they should prioritize building a beautiful church, even if that means it will be smaller or less trendy.

if a church has skilled musicians in their midst, they should prioritize using those musicians in worship, even if it means the style of the music changes.

the church should always prioritize hymns and spiritual songs which exemplify goodness, truth, and beauty in their composition and lyrics, even if it means newcomers don't understand every line yet.

all these forms of beauty should reflect the beauty of the story of the Gospel.

[cent-scratchnsniff]

something bad did indeed happen to that man. spent abt 25 minutes trying to find a better picture of that one (1) offical piece with his eyes open that wasnt compressed or tiny

[premamelody]

2 am and my brain said "make a uty au where clover locks in and rolls a nat 20 and actually avoids flowey in his subconscious long enough to have an entire party of strong feelings and memories from him"

like it said "what if we kinda like cogdis'd meta flowey wouldn't that be so cool"

[novelconcepts]

It really frees up so much mental real estate when you start thinking of sex as just: a thing people sometimes do. Some people are super into it! Some aren't! It's for fun! It's for intimacy! It's the deepest connection some people will ever feel and totally meaningless to others! It's hot! It's boring! It helps some people sleep! It exists as an exciting construct solely in fantasy for others! What it isn't is some complicated moral ground that needs to be fought against at every turn. It's just A Thing. Which means people who have a lot of it, or none of it, or whatever in between are all worth the same. Which means stories that have a lot of it, or none of it, or whatever in between are worth the same, too. Smut isn't less valuable than "clean" stories. People who have a high "body count" aren't less valuable than those who have never had sex at all. It's just A Thing. Making peace with sex as just A Thing that is natural to consentingly have or not have, want or not want, really is a great adjustment to your brainspace.